i will

I finally gave up on Stories. I found a website with a decently active, well-organized writing section, so I set up shop there. Unfortunately, I haven't been getting any feedback on my stuff so far, but I'm still very new. I figure as I participate in challenges and discussion and such more people might take interest in my crap. I also have to review other people's stuff, of course! Oh right, that website is here. It's mostly a graphics site, so it's actually surprising that it has the best writing section I've seen so far. I've already participated in one challenge, though it's not over yet so I don't know how I did. I imagine the deadline will end up extended since it's over in two days and only two people have entered. There's also a new challenge up that I plan to try writing something Eysuria-based for. I figure if I can, I should always make my challenge entries from Eysuria.

Um right so. I got wasted out of my head Saturday night. Justin had a bunch of his friends over and I just drank way too much. I don't remember most of it. I'm pretty embarrassed, but luckily they're all a very understanding group. What gets me about it is that Danny got annoyed and frustrated by the way I was acting, and when I ended up throwing up in bed (ew, by the way, you know it's a bad night when not only do you throw up but it's not in a toilet/trash can/sink) he just left me there, went and blamed other people for letting me get so drunk, and then went to sleep in the game room. Heather came in an took care of me. She stripped the bed, set me up with a pillow with a towel over it in case I threw up again (I did), and even slept in there with me. I ended up waking up at 7:30 or so and wandering into the game room to fall asleep with Danny, though I don't remember that part.

So yes, I was very upset with Danny. I mean, of course it was really my fault for getting so wasted, but if anyone's supposed to look out for me, it's him. He can't blame other people for letting me drink so much. And I can't believe he didn't take care of me, he just let Heather do it. What an asshole. I understand that he was tired and I was irritating in my drunkenness, but at that point I had no control over any of it, and he should have understood that. I talked to him about it. He was not at all apologetic. He told me he didn't deserve to get thrown up on, and when he was at this age and getting wasted out of his head, there was no one to take care of him. He cleaned up all his own messes and sometimes, yes, slept in blood or vomit. I told him that it's different now, we do have each other, and I would always be there for him no matter how frustratingly drunk he got. The closest thing I got to an apology from him was, "Well from now on let's make sure we always take care of each other. Let's not let either one of us drink that much again. Especially me. I'm old now. I'd still be passed out now if it had been me." Or something like that.

But yeah. Once again proving that our roommates are such genuinely good people. I couldn't thank Heather enough.

I desperately need a nap; I got like five hours of sleep last night, and the sleep I got while fucked out of my brain the night before didn't really do anything for me. So I'm probably going to be falling asleep here in a few minutes. And when I wake up I have to go to a Starbucks I found that's actually hiring and hit up the manager.

All my final grades posted but ARHU318 (Writers' House). The prof for that sent me an email asking for the introduction I forgot to put in my final portfolio, which makes me feel even more stupid and anxious about my potential grade in that class; it was in the instructions, I just missed it. Gah. I mean, since I wasn't there the day she assigned it (and with an excused absence, no less), maybe she'll give me some leeway. I wasn't the only one who forgot it either. But I still need to reprint my portfolio for Johnna because apparently she needs it in 12pt Times.

Anyway, I did scrape an A- in French, so she must have curved the grades a bit (omg thank you). So that's two As and two Bs on my more weighted classes. In fact, one of each for my two 4-credits and one of each for my two 3-credits. ARHU318 is only a one credit. I'm not going to hope for an A. I was not an A student in that class this semester, even forgiving her lack of a syllabus. But a B shouldn't be too much to ask for. I feel like you'd have to really fuck up to get a C in a Writers' House course.

They cancelled one of my summer courses due to lack of enrollment. I added Junior English to try to make up for it, but I'm waitlisted. I added myself to two of the waitlisted sections and I'm first on each, so it's reasonable to hope I'll get in; surely at least one student will decide they don't want to pay for the class and drop out, right? So the only thing I'm really worried about it the fact that MATH212, the cancelled class, is a prerequisite for MATH213, which I'm also enrolled for. I hope they still let me take it. It's not my fault the prereq was cancelled. And I doubt there's really anything learned in 212 that I can't pick up just from taking 213. They're the same concept, just 212 is for teaching more basic math and 213 is for geometry-type-stuff. I emailed my advisor to let her know what's going on and ask her advice.

Oh, and it seems like no one's hiring but restaurants. Justin talked to his manager for me at Safeway and introduced me, but Safeway has a hiring freeze on currently; the manager said they're trying to shuffle current employees around before hiring new ones since some stores are understaffed but others are overstaffed. But he also said that no one wants to move, so they're having trouble; no one wants to drive too far to work. Starbucks isn't actively hiring. Heather said her work is hiring because a lot of their girls went home for the summer, and she said that she thinks I could teach a summer camp with no problem; if she says so, I'll believe her. It's a little intimidating since she works at a place where they coach gymnastics, and she used to be world-class. But she said she'll talk to her boss and ask for me. She also said starting is $9/hr while training. And it sounds like I could get at least semi-decent hours. So here's hoping, but I won't find out until she gets back from wherever she went with Dennis this weekend. It's crazy how great my roommates are though. Justin and Heather both so willing to help. I know I'm a bit of a shut-in, kind of on the antisocial side, but they're still so helpful.

People can be so wonderful.

Also, I'm reading Warbreaker, Sanderson's free e-Book. It's interesting; his worlds always are. I think he did a better job in Mistborn of introducing names of places and concepts more gradually and naturally, but I'm curious about the world and the magic system, so I'm along for the ride. He's releasing it in book form for sale in early June; I'll almost certainly buy it, if only to support him. Maybe I'll buy Elantris too and give it another shot.

I've been working quite a bit. Full time restauranting isn't terribly fun. I work a double tomorrow and Saturday, though Saturday I'm going to leave at jumpstart if possible so I can eat dinner with Danny, Alli, cousin Justin, Grammy, Gene, and possibly Matt. If I can't, it's not a huge deal, it'd probably be nice as just blood family. But they all invited me from the start, so it's not like I'm unwelcome or anything.

But yeah. We also had Danny's coworker over. I have a lot in common with her and we could be great friends. She's 17, and she reminds me a lot of me in certain ways when I first met Danny. She works at Starbucks, and she works with Danny (though at Gamestop), has about as much experience with alcohol as I'd had when I met him, and other similarities in interests and such. Which was a serious weird factor at first since it's like... if Danny didn't have me now, would he start up the same sort of relationship with her? Well, the age gap is much steeper there, and he insists that they'd fight way too much, and I know he finds me more attractive. But the similarities are still kind of unnerving.

I'm not at all worried, mind you. I trust him completely.

Anyway we had her over and gave her champagne. Just champagne and not that much, but she ended up getting sick all over the futon and floor, and god the smell is resilient! What an awful stench to come out of such an innocent, unassuming body! I think it's the Doritos she had since it bears a striking kinship to the smell of non-barfed Doritos, but of course barfed Doritos smell horribly gross instead of yummy. Danny has outlawed them for at least a month.

Aside from that, we've had some fighting, some of which left me really depressed and doubtful, but we basically ended at the conclusion that sometimes he's going to want to play video games or fuck with his computer even when I'm there and I'll have to find something to do for myself while he's doing that. Which, I mean, should be perfect incentive to write, huh? What really got me was his concern over my decreased interest in video games. I just don't like playing Gears as much anymore, or other games for that matter. I'm going to try to get back into some of them at least while I have the time over winter break, because it's an important bond.

Meh.

Also, worked out with Heather today, lots of fun. She taught me some cool exercises and stretches. Yay former gymnast as an exercise buddy!

I'm sick. I couldn't sleep last night because of a sore throat. My throat feels better now (due probably in part to Danny forcefeeding me disgusting DayQuil) but my muscles all still ache from the constant tossing and turning and not getting any rest in general. And my stomach had that empty ache, but I think it's starting to turn into just hunger.

At least I don't work today.

Well anyway. Dennis and Heather brought over his mom's cat because she's out of town. He's fat but cute, very polite compared to a lot of cats. He seems to like people, he's only very very mildly skittish. You'd have to actually startle him to set him flying... if you approach him, he'll sit and let you pet him. When I was eating lunch yesterday he was sitting on my feet sniffing at my sandwich. I gave him little pieces of turkey on my plate to keep him from sniffing and/or licking at the sandwich itself. =)

I need contacts. I'm wearing my last pair and it worries me whenever they act up because I don't want to lose them.

I only made $27 Sunday morning (it was dead, I only had five tables). And I only made $62 yesterday. That's not SO bad I guess. Thinking about it, since I was cut early it was about $10 an hour tax free. I didn't sell any merchandise or Blue Moon or anything like that though. I work my first trivia night Wednesday night, hopefully I'll do better then.

Okay so naps and stuff. I was hoping to pick up my parking pass and maybe go to the gym on campus today but I have to feel better first.

Grades were supposed to be posted today -- I checked last night and they were up. I made a 3.28, which is a little close for comfort in my opinion. Danny was trying to convince me that B+s are 3.5s, which would have been nice, but unfortunately they might as well not put a plus or minus for all the good they do. I think I'll do better next semester, though, since I have an idea of how everything works now.

I need to go to the gym. I haven't been since it closed... which is over a week, almost two. I plan to go tomorrow, before, during, or after my probable visit with Alicia -- dunno which yet.

I got my partner number at Starbucks today, and it's the same one I had last time, which is nice. Unfortunately my partner card won't work accept as an ordinary Starbucks card because the card number is deactivated when you leave the company, not just the partner number. I called to ask about it today, and in four months or so I should get my new one. It doesn't really matter; the partner number keyed in works just the same.

I'm replaying Kingdom Hearts. I'm going to play some more as soon as I finish this, just until Danny gets home in half an hour or so. I'm only to Traverse Town; the bad guy there kicked my ass until I get sick of trying. I need to level up some more. I didn't spend enough time wandering the city. I sure as hell spent enough time on the Islands, though. It only took three fights for me to beat Riku, and then I kept fighting him until it was 3 to 2. You get another little item for that, it turns out. Fighting all three of the others is harder, but I did that too.

Um. My dad emailed me from Korea. It was a nice email. I told him a little about what's been going on, and my grades.

My new years was great. It was just Danny, Dennis, Justin, me, Heather, and Alli, and we hung out and played Rock Band and then drinking Apples to Apples. I love that game, and I have a much longer attention span for it than anyone else.

Right, so I better go if I want to have time to play.