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karriezaiOh my god it's finally over. I came home from school yesterday with Danny and found this dry-erase board with calculations on it. One side was Guilford, one side was Maryland, one year for each. According to my parents' calculations, Maryland was $12,000 without books and Guilford was $11,000, $8,000 if I got the Honors scholarship. (All this is approximate, of course.) But I looked at it and went, "Their calculations are wrong." So I pulled out my financial aid info from Guilford. My parents said they didn't have the Guilford financial aid info to look at, and that's true, but my mom's the one who opened my mail when I first got it, so she saw it too. Anyway, they were counting work study twice and counting a loan as a scholarship. (I get the same loan at Maryland.) So, corrected calculations have Maryland at about $12,000 and Guilford at about $14,000 (including the possible Honors scholarship). Plus, Maryland's cost includes books and Guilford's doesn't. At least, according to the website. Mom says the financial adviser they talked to put the cost at $17,000 without books, but uh, still cheaper than Guilford so what do I care?
So I'm gonna be a Terp! God I'm ecstatic. It feels so great to have that stress off my shoulders. It solves so many problems.
So yeah, I'm happy.
Then there's that shooting at Virginia Tech. It's a horrible thing, but it feels distant to me, like yeah I know it's horrible but it doesn't really have anything to do with me. I don't know anyone there. After looking at the crime ratings for colleges, the first thing I thought when I saw it on the news (back when it was one dead and nine injured) was "Their crime statistics are fucked." Which is kind of insensitive. I felt bad when Danny picked me up and was checking on friends he has at Virginia Tech (who were all okay, by the way).
Watched this movie called Idiocracy with Luke Wilson in it... and it was absolutely retarded, but in the right way. It was actually really funny. It was about this guy who got put into suspended animation (basically) and wakes up 500 years later... but evolution took a wrong turn, and mankind got incredibly retarded, until this really average guy from our day is the smartest man on earth in the future. Like I said, it was dumb as fuck, but really funny.
And ah, I had the best talk with Danny last night. We both feel the same way about each other, we're such a great match. It started because he was talking about an ex, and he called her by name, which felt weird. I told him so -- it felt weird, not necessarily bad, but very weird -- and he said he knows, he doesn't like hearing me talk about my exes. And this picture I drew for an ex of mine, Tim... it's the best picture I've ever drawn, I think, and it's one of the ones I sent him in an email, and he said when he saw it he couldn't think about how good the art was because the first thing he saw was that it was obvious I drew it for another guy.
It's a weird thing. I don't get why so many people (including me) are like that -- they feel awkward hearing about their lover's exes no matter how close their relationship is now.
He also said even though he trusts me completely, he's worried I'll go off to college and find someone better... like I'm above him, and I'll realize that and go for some talented college guy. I told him he doesn't ever have to worry about that, because there's no one better than him. But I'm glad to know I don't have to feel stupid for the occasional jealous or worried twinge that I know is absolutely moronic and immediately dismiss. Because I trust him completely, too.
And hearing him talk about us a year from now or more... and how he wants to still be together when we're fifty-something and have me wake him up "that special way we talked about"... I absolutely love hearing it because I feel the same way. Which reminds me of something else he said. He said some people just have to be reassured (he used Yuka as an example, said she'll be friends with anyone who'll tell her she's pretty all the time) and said he's like that in that he likes to be reminded that he's the only one for me. I guess I'm the same after a fashion, except I don't have to be told... but I adore the little ways he shows it. I can see how much he cares and that's a huge part of what attracts me to him. It's something I was thinking about a while back: I think sometimes the way someone loves you makes you love them even more, and vice versa, so it's kind of a cycle or whatever.
We haven't fought yet. There have been moments that could have become fights, but we didn't let it get that far, I guess. He said he's not looking forward to the first fight. I guess I'm not either, but I'm not worried. I've never fought much with anyone. It depends on the person, I guess. Like obviously I've fought with my parents. And Alicia and I have had arguments. But I never fought with Bianca or Lisa or Ash. Granted, I was never close, see-you-all-the-time friends with any of them for more than a year or so. Obviously fights will happen, I just don't think it'll be an issue. After a fight, I think about it, calm down, reason it out, and try to see where I'm wrong. I mean, prime example: Alicia and I have always made up after fights, haha.
Eh. Anyway. I love the guy. He joked he'd marry me if I bought a Corvette, and when I said no way, he said I should have been crafty and bought a toy Corvette. (I might smell another anniversary present, lol.)
Okay, I was supposed to correct my scholarship essay and I only have twenty minutes left now, way to go me. Blah.
So I'm gonna be a Terp! God I'm ecstatic. It feels so great to have that stress off my shoulders. It solves so many problems.
So yeah, I'm happy.
Then there's that shooting at Virginia Tech. It's a horrible thing, but it feels distant to me, like yeah I know it's horrible but it doesn't really have anything to do with me. I don't know anyone there. After looking at the crime ratings for colleges, the first thing I thought when I saw it on the news (back when it was one dead and nine injured) was "Their crime statistics are fucked." Which is kind of insensitive. I felt bad when Danny picked me up and was checking on friends he has at Virginia Tech (who were all okay, by the way).
Watched this movie called Idiocracy with Luke Wilson in it... and it was absolutely retarded, but in the right way. It was actually really funny. It was about this guy who got put into suspended animation (basically) and wakes up 500 years later... but evolution took a wrong turn, and mankind got incredibly retarded, until this really average guy from our day is the smartest man on earth in the future. Like I said, it was dumb as fuck, but really funny.
And ah, I had the best talk with Danny last night. We both feel the same way about each other, we're such a great match. It started because he was talking about an ex, and he called her by name, which felt weird. I told him so -- it felt weird, not necessarily bad, but very weird -- and he said he knows, he doesn't like hearing me talk about my exes. And this picture I drew for an ex of mine, Tim... it's the best picture I've ever drawn, I think, and it's one of the ones I sent him in an email, and he said when he saw it he couldn't think about how good the art was because the first thing he saw was that it was obvious I drew it for another guy.
It's a weird thing. I don't get why so many people (including me) are like that -- they feel awkward hearing about their lover's exes no matter how close their relationship is now.
He also said even though he trusts me completely, he's worried I'll go off to college and find someone better... like I'm above him, and I'll realize that and go for some talented college guy. I told him he doesn't ever have to worry about that, because there's no one better than him. But I'm glad to know I don't have to feel stupid for the occasional jealous or worried twinge that I know is absolutely moronic and immediately dismiss. Because I trust him completely, too.
And hearing him talk about us a year from now or more... and how he wants to still be together when we're fifty-something and have me wake him up "that special way we talked about"... I absolutely love hearing it because I feel the same way. Which reminds me of something else he said. He said some people just have to be reassured (he used Yuka as an example, said she'll be friends with anyone who'll tell her she's pretty all the time) and said he's like that in that he likes to be reminded that he's the only one for me. I guess I'm the same after a fashion, except I don't have to be told... but I adore the little ways he shows it. I can see how much he cares and that's a huge part of what attracts me to him. It's something I was thinking about a while back: I think sometimes the way someone loves you makes you love them even more, and vice versa, so it's kind of a cycle or whatever.
We haven't fought yet. There have been moments that could have become fights, but we didn't let it get that far, I guess. He said he's not looking forward to the first fight. I guess I'm not either, but I'm not worried. I've never fought much with anyone. It depends on the person, I guess. Like obviously I've fought with my parents. And Alicia and I have had arguments. But I never fought with Bianca or Lisa or Ash. Granted, I was never close, see-you-all-the-time friends with any of them for more than a year or so. Obviously fights will happen, I just don't think it'll be an issue. After a fight, I think about it, calm down, reason it out, and try to see where I'm wrong. I mean, prime example: Alicia and I have always made up after fights, haha.
Eh. Anyway. I love the guy. He joked he'd marry me if I bought a Corvette, and when I said no way, he said I should have been crafty and bought a toy Corvette. (I might smell another anniversary present, lol.)
Okay, I was supposed to correct my scholarship essay and I only have twenty minutes left now, way to go me. Blah.